Syrian cities have a lot of decrepit movie theaters. Posters of past shows are stapled over the entrances and they're all for T-and-A or B-grade action flicks. My favourite was for one called "Lunar Cop" which had the tagline, "He came down to Earth to clean up the mess!" For the sexy movies, Lonely Planet warns that censors usually remove the scenes depicted in the posters.
I had a couple of hours to kill one afternoon so I asked about the next feature. It was "House Bunny" with Anna Faris starring as an ex-Playboy model who ends up as a sorority house mother. I went in.
The theater was completely dark so I waited for the film to start in order to have enough light to find a seat. But the projection on the screen was so dim I ended up taking the seat closest to the door. Even then, I wasn't sure I wasn't about to sit on someone. (Imagine watching TV through two pairs of sunglasses and you'll get an idea of how dark it was in there.)
I couldn't hear anyone else and thought I was alone until 10 minutes into the show when I saw a lighter flash and the ember of a burning cigarette a few rows ahead. The smoker began to emit a high-pitched giggle at unusual times and banged his seat occasionally. He talked sometimes, too, and I don't think he was on a cellphone. He particularly enjoyed a scene the censors appeared to have missed which briefly showed Anna Faris' bare backside.
The lights came on when thew show was over, and I could see that many of the seats were broken. There were some where only parts of metal bolted to the floor remained. I was thankful I hadn't tried to find a seat further in.
The experience cost less than a dollar, but I don't think I'll be doing it again. Unless, of course, "Lunar Cop" is playing.
In India people warned me that movie theatres were often inhabited by rats. Being from Alberta I had only ever seen rats in cartoons and that scared the crap out of me. I was glad to be short so I could watch the whole film with my feet tucked under me.
ReplyDeleteI had to go get some air a couple times because so many people were smoking bindies which are sweet and, even second-hand, make you dizzy.
There was no flesh in the film or sexy talk. But I must say that the run-of-the-mill Bollywood film has way more enticing innuendo than any Hollywood film...if you can ignore the cheese. I loved it.
WellRobert, I can only imagine! In Calgary we would sometimes go to the cheap movies at the dome and would experience the same sort of thing, except that this theatre would be rated #1 compared to this. Glad you are having a good time.
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